Men, Why We Get Angry

The Brother’s Keeper Blog


The day is going well; we have a good sense this is going to be a great day, then out of nowhere, we find the irritation of a comment, a moment, a person setting us off. Immediately, we turn to blame, criticism and complaining. What is it that’s upsetting us? Are we genuinely bothered by the fact that our teenage son or daughter have eaten the special snack? Are we honestly worried that the dishes haven’t been taken care of? Are we truly bothered there is no dinner, and we are having cereal tonight? NO, if we stop for a minute, these are lingering emotions to an underlined issue. So what’s it? What is bothering us? Well, today we are going to explore why we are so angry and what we can do about it.

Irritation, anger, and frustration in men boil down to three areas in life. It doesn’t matter whether we are in your faith journey, if we do not address these three areas in our life, we’re going to become or remain irritated, angry, and frustrated. There is good news if we remove our pride and ego and allow humility in, we will find hope and transformation in our future.

Area 1 – No Time

You, me, and every other human living today has been given the same amount of time each day, each week, month, and year. Yet, time is not our challenge.

Area 2 – No Money

We all come from different economic levels. Whether we have a dollar or a million dollars in our bank today, it’s not enough and never will be to prevent the anger, frustration, and irritation we feel. This is not our challenge.

Area 3 – No Control

Regardless of our position at work, church, or home we struggle with the fact that we do not have the control we desire and this is leaving us feeling angry, frustrated, and irritated. This is not our challenge.

Our challenge is we feel inadequate. This lie has haunted us too long. It’s time we adjust our minds and set our path to truth. The truth is, more time, money, and control is not our solution, and we know it. It’s time we stop telling God what’s on our heart and ask Him what’s on His, for us. I’ve done this in the last six months and here is what I’m hearing. 

  1. Replace your desire to control, with contentment

  2. Replace your desire for more time, with the truth.

  3. Replace your desire for more money with more gratitude.

Simple? Not Easy! I’m still messing up at times.

Mindset is about desiring a change in both what we believe and how we behave. Our minds shape our actions, and our actions drive clarity. So, hear this. “We are not inadequate. We are growing.” In John 10:10 Jesus said:

The thief (satan) comes only (note the only) to steal and kill and destroy. I (Jesus) came that they (you and I, all of humanity) have life and have it abundantly.
— John 10:10

Recognizing this TRUTH and accepting the power of these words will set us on the path to Pursuing our Potential. The potential to LOVE unconditionally. LISTEN intentionally. LEAD a bold and triumphant life!

So, what are we going to do the next time the lie of inadequacy comes our way?

We will choose to FIGHT! We will suit up with the armor of God, wearing a breastplate of righteousness to protect our heart. We will put on the helmet of salvation to protect our mind and thoughts by remembering God desires us to be contentment is all He has given us, life and an abundant one. We will put on the belt of truth, and plant the Word of God in our heart. We will raise the shield of faith and swing the sword of the Spirit as we advance God’s truth by sharing His gospel with our shoes that move us forward. And like any fight, we are not alone. We will be our Brother’s Keeper, shoulder to shoulder, meeting together to encourage one another with accountability to grow.

For it is precept upon precept, precept upon precept, line upon line, line upon line, here a little, there a little.
— Isaiah 28:10

The quote from Isaiah instructs us to how we grow, a little at a time. Never give up, Never give in, always give it to God!

Call to Action:

Will you invite God in to remove your desire to control, with a contentment heart and mind. You indeed have what you need; you wrestle with what you want. (Me too!) Will you invite God in to show you it is not time you need, it’s truth in how to prioritize your time. This is where you will find peace. Will you invite God in to remove the lie that more money is a solution and pray He gives you the strength and desire to walk up each day to take a moment to thank Him for all you have to be grateful for. It is here we displace our anger, frustration, and irritation with the ability to LOVE. LISTEN. LEAD.

You have all you need to Pursue your Potential!

Chris Hewitt

Time, Money, ControlChris Hewitt