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As a writer, I love to read, and when I read, I get ideas. Like the one in this week’s Sunday Coach CONNECT. Have you ever considered looking at life in terms of a book? God would be the author, the chapters are significant milestones, and the pages are your days? Think about it for a minute. How does your book read right now? How did it start out? Where are you at today? How will it end?

I wish to share with you three milestones which most men face, often before the age of 40. It is how we choose to respond to these milestones which determine how our book will read. Every day we are writing new pages. What we choose to do now will be what people read (remember) about our story?

In my experience, most men by the time they reach 40 years of age will have experienced one or more of these events:

  1. Marriage

  2. Birth of a child

  3. Anniversaries in marriage and work

  4. Death of a family member

  5. Death of a pet

While these events can be significant in our lives, they may not impact our lives in an altering way. At least not like the examples I provide below. For the examples below determine a decision one must make as they decide whether Humility, Integrity, Truth, Obedience, and Prayer will guide their life or not. Men of HITOP accept these attributes to motivate them to LOVE unconditionally, LISTEN intentionally, and LEAD boldly. Men of pride, questionable character, lies, etc. invite in a myriad of bad decisions and consequences. There are three in particular which I have seen alter men’s lives. Not because the choice they made was to allow these events in, but rather because of the decision they made to repent and resist them going forward.


Few men by the age of 40 will have lived without experiencing the pressure of deciding on whether to break the law or not. Some will have been tempted to drink underage; others drive without a license, some break in entering to attend a party, while others will steal to prove their loyalty to the group they desire to be a part of.

Every all-knowing, invincible teenager that has made this type of choice can tell you at the time they decided, the consequence of being caught did not enter their mind, nor did the events that would follow, like losing the trust of a loved-one, hurting those the crime dishonors, etc.  


I do not know a man alive, who by the age of 40, is free from exposure to the sin of pornography. It has gripped the heart and mind of the strongest, most influential, and most faithful men by tainting them to believe the lie it offers. It will distort your reality of what is true. It will wound, devastate, and destroy.

So why do we freely invite it into our lives to become a page or perhaps chapter of our book?

Fear, Worry, Anxiety

Romans 8:28 reads “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Most men can relate to these words, but they refuse to admit their struggle with them. Pride, vulnerability, refusal of being authentic, and fear of being seen as weak prevents most men from moving past a surface-level conversation into one which is real. An experienced friend or coach, however, can see the struggle. Through the guidance of the Holy Spirit, and by speaking words of Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-Control the experienced friend or coach will “cast out” these battles. Pages of Fear, Worry, and Anxiety can leave one feeling as if they are spinning out of control, because you are. Fear, Worry, and Anxiety is the absence of control and control is a false belief of reality. We are not in control of anything except our response and attitude.

So what will the pages of your response read? Will they speak of the man you are who rejects pride and has become humble? Will they demonstrate the man you were when no one was looking? Will they represent a man who has sought after the Truth of God’s Word? Accepted the responsibility needed to be Obedient? Will they communicate how Prayer fundamentally altered your life and way of thinking from who you were as a man who once struggled with the law, pornography, and fear, worry, and anxiety?

My prayer for the last seven years has been to read the pages of my book as inspiring stories of where HITOP Life has impacted many lives to Pursue Their Potential!

Pursue Your Potential

If there is something in your life writing a story you do not wish to read, I encourage you to know you can change this story and write a new chapter. God desires you to be the very person He created you for, impact the lives He has placed in yours, and speak words of Truth to help encourage others. He is calling you to LOVE unconditionally, LISTEN intentionally, and LEAD boldly.

If there is anything I can help you with, give me a call or reach out to me via email at

Pursue Your Potential!